my boys

I'm beginning to think this second boy may be a lot like our first (which is not a bad thing at all). During our last ultrasound, baby had the hiccups; B constantly had the hiccups in utero.  Baby starts moving and shaking every night when I'm ready to go to bed; B followed the same pattern.  At 23 weeks, baby can already move my entire belly with his insanely strong kicks; B was definitely the less gentle twin.  

I am completely in love with Barnes, and I am completely in love with this new little one.  They may be totally different, which will be wonderful.  They may be carbon copies of each other, which will be wonderful.  But I can't help but notice the similarities seeming to pop up already.

And because we had such a fun trip to Nashville this holiday weekend, I have to share a few phone pics:

visiting with Aunt Rebecca--she's clearly using her teacher skills

sliding with dad

first crawfish boil

pit stop on the way home at dinosaur world

sprinkler time

We are so thankful for Andrew's job, but we don't love it when he travels.  The twins are getting old enough to really miss him...to point to our room and ask "dad?"  Luckily we often have grandparents and baby-sitters around to help, but it's still not quite the same.  After a full week without dad, a low-key weekend spent soaking up some outdoor fun was just what Barnes and Frances needed.  And when you are 20 months old, what's more fun than your first time playing in the sprinkler?

f wasn't too sure and needed a little encouragement

but she eventually decided it was fun

b jumped right in

this one has no fear

halfway

Baby boy has made it past the 20 week mark--more than half-way to the day we get to meet him!  I am beginning to feel him squirm more, which is my absolute favorite part of being pregnant.  I'm also in almost exclusively maternity clothes, which are my least favorite part of being pregnant.

Being pregnant is a bit like a running a half-marathon.  The beginning can be slow and difficult.  Then, you hit your stride, and by the half-way point (around mile 7) you feel great.  You're thinking, "I'm going to finish this thing strong.  No problem."  Somewhere around mile 10, though, fatigue kicks in.  Despite the fact that you only have a few miles left, each step seems to get harder and harder.  Finally, you see the finish line.  You push across because you absolutely have to, and crossing that line is incredible.  You are tired and weary, but you are exhilarated.

Below is a picture of our sweet little son.  We are hoping he still has around 19 weeks to grow inside, and we are doing everything we can to make sure he stays put as long as possible.

profile at 19.5 weeks

3d at 19.5 weeks.  sweet, scrawny little face

20 months

Where are my babies?  B&F are now 20 months old, which means two things...1) they are way closer to two than one, and 2) I only have four months to plan their second birthday party.  What are we loving these days?

• Hot wheels.  They both love to line up their cars and make them "vroom vroom" on every surface available.  The school bus and garbage truck are particular favorites and have caused many fights.
• Mardi gras beads.  Frances has 6 necklaces that she wears all day every day.  Obsessed.
• Birds.  We have stools at our front windows and put a bird feeder outside, and B&F spend hours waiting and watching for birds.  Unfortunately we have mostly attracted squirrels, but B&F find them fairly entertaining as well.
• Fruit.  I think my kids are fruitarians.  Except for sausage.  So fruit and sausage.
• Our lovies.  It took them a while to catch on, but now they are super attached to the lovies that live in their cribs.  Their favorite thing is to get them all out while I'm getting ready upstairs, take them to the one bedroom with carpet, and lay on the floor cuddling with them.  Super sweet to sneak up on.
• Animals.  We really love all animals.  Zoos of any size are a huge hit.  Just don't mind us if we bark at every single animal (we really love barking right now).
• Being outside.  As the weather is warming, it's getting harder and harder to wrangle these kids back inside.  I love watching their sense of adventure blossom and can't wait to see what fun summer has in store.
• Cleaning our hands.  They constantly point to the hand sanitizer and want to clean their little hands.  There are definitely worse habits.
• Helping.  They like to think they are helping, even when their help is less than helpful.  I'm trying to brainstorm on how to best utilize this hobby.
• Stickers.  Love them.  Want them on our feet.

we belong to each other

my sister's family

This weekend I was able to travel to Virginia to visit my sister and her family.  I had the privilege of spending a regular day with my nephew (almost 5) and two nieces (2 and 6 months), which is pretty rare.  Living so far apart, we are usually only together for special occasions, which can feel too busy and too scheduled for real quality time.  Saturday, though, we were able to leisurely enjoy the town they have fallen in love with, playing at the river, strolling downtown.

On the plane ride home, while reading one of my new favorite books Carry On, Warrior, I was thinking about how much we really do belong to each other.  Sure, I haven't seen my nephew and nieces in a year, but they are mine.  They are mine to pray for and lift up and protect and love.  Their little family and my little family are interwoven in so many ways.  And being in Indiana, I don't get to see my dear Tennessee friends often.  But they are mine.  They are mine to pray for and lift up and encourage on their journeys.  Despite time and distance, we truly do belong to each other.  We are a species wired for connection, made to crave community.  Luckily, that community need not be restricted by tangible boundaries.  Our communities can stretch and change and withstand and endure.

So as I was pondering all of this, the Boston Marathon bombing occurred.  I love marathons.  I have never run one (13.1 miles is enough for me), but I am inspired by those who do.  The endurance and strength a marathon requires is symbolic of so much in life.

After we put the twins to bed, we turned on the news and watched the images now seared on America's mind.  Horrific.  Senseless.  Terrifying.  But what most struck me the first time I saw the film of the bombs exploding was that so many, including police, military personnel, and civilians, rushed toward the blasts.  Rather than running away, they ran towards the injured.  They rushed into danger for the sake of strangers in need.  They get it.  They know that we belong to each other.  That we ALL belong to each other.

Prayers and love to all those affected today.

tiebreaker

It's official, the Shafer girls are going to be outnumbered.  That's right, it's a BOY!!!  We are thrilled to be welcoming another son...though we're not sure what Frances's thoughts on the situation are.

I just love finding out the sex of our baby.  For me, at least, it makes the baby more real.  I can take this little one out of the "it" column and plant him firmly in the "him."  I can think about names and nursery and clothes and all things blue.  I can more concretely dream of what his precious life will be like.

We are thankful.  We are excited.  And we are trying to prepare for the onslaught of trucks/trains/balls that is sure to fill our home.

one down

As of today, Baby #3 has officially made it to the second trimester!  We are thrilled that things appear to be progressing normally, and the fact that this baby is on its way to our family is still quite surreal.  Thank you all so much for the well wishes you have sent our way!

Many people have asked if this pregnancy feels different since it's just one baby, by which I believe they mean easier.  Interestingly, this one has been a bit more difficult.  I was sicker during the early weeks and the fatigue has been a little greater.  It's hard, however, to separate what is pregnancy fatigue and what is twin-chasing fatigue.  Luckily, as we move into the next trimester, the nausea appears to be fading and I'm hopeful that my appetite (which is literally larger than a 17-year-old boy's) will subside.  Whatever side effects arise, though, I rest in the fact that any temporary discomfort is so worth welcoming this baby in 26 weeks.

People also keep asking how my baby bump compares with the twins.  I'm hoping to not get quite so big so fast, but I do have the whole second pregnancy thing working against me.  For anyone who is curious, I'll leave you with a current comparison: